Laying here in the hospital bed since Wednesday, suffered a slight heart attack but everything seems to be okay. My brother Tim was here and stayed with me until today. Both of my girls came and Tony has been coming to see me every night. Chemo is on hold for the moment. We're hoping the other issues resolve themselves.

Tuesday October 27

Just a short update. The doctor office called at 3:30 yesterday and wanted me to come in for blood work. Thankfully Harry and Barb were here so they took me in. The platelet count was up to 34 and white count 2.6 2 which were improvements. I have an appointment tomorrow at 8:50 for more blood work and then will see the doctor. My brother Tim and his wife Carla are coming this afternoon so they will be able to take me. Sarah stayed again last night and helped me with a few jobs this morning before she left for classes. Pray for my energy level.

October26

God's blessings on each of you this day. May you feel His peace, joy and love.

I sure wish it would quit raining. The gloomy weather does not help with my energy level. Just want to crawl back into bed which would be the worst thing I could do. I hope to clean up my bedroom and get some clean clothes put away. I really want to move winter clothes to the front and get rid of summer clothes I did not wear all year. No sense in holding on to things I don't wear. I can always buy a few new things next year if I need to.

Saturday the platelets were up to 20 from 15 which was a good sign that bone marrow is picking up . I will call today and see what they want to do next. I am scheduled for chemo this week but think it will probably be canceled which will bum me out.

It was good to have Nicole and Charli here on the weekend. Saturday I had a lot of energy and we did a few little errands. Mostly I stayed in the car with Charli and Nicole did the running. Felt good to be out of the house.

Tony and I were able to go to the Meyer's for dinner last night. Sarah came and stayed with me. Will check with dr. to see if we can stop that since counts are up a little.

Saturday

Nicole and Charli are here. They are getting ready to take me back to Boone Hospital for blood work. I spent 6 hours there yesterday receiving 2 units of blood. My platelets counts continue to be critically low but did show slight improvement yesterday so praying they are still on the rise today. If not I will be getting platelets. We left the port open so won't have to be stuck again today which is a blessing.

I am not sure if I'll get my scheduled chemo this week because of blood issues will just have to wait and see what happens.

Blood Counts

I saw Dr. Honeycutt yesterday and blood levels for platelets, white cells and red cells were critical. I had to have someone stay with me in case I fell, so Tony volunteered and will be here again tonight.

Sylvia took me in early this morning to redo blood work. Things have not improved and I was very dizzy and weak, so they kept me for some more fluids. I feel a Little stronger and am praying by tomorrow things have turned the corner.

FIRSTS

Yesterday was a day of firsts. I went to Wal-Mart by myself for the first time in two months. It proved to be to much for me, but made it home safely. Called MaryAnne and she came quickly.
we couldn't decide what was going on so called 911. That's right my first trip by ambulance to the ER. Not very cushy. After tests, exams and CT scan determined bl odd levels were low. Tweaked some meds and home I went.

Today was my regular visit with Dr. Honeycutt and blood counts are critically low. She strongly suggested I not be alone for 48 hours. Barb is hare now and will have a friend later this afternoon, Tony early evening and a friend all night. PRAY the levels start to rebound on their own. I have to do blood work the next two days to see if I need a transfusion of platelets.

Monday, October 19

Praise God that the sun is shining! Hopefully I can get outside for at least a little while and enjoy God's creation.

I did go to KC with Harry and Barb. By the time we arrived at Jenn's, she had Ben at the doctor with a high fever. Nicole came and picked me up and I moved to her house. Friday I kept Charli since daycare was closed. By 11 she was curled up in my lap asleep. Scott came home, checked her temp (103) and called Nicole. Gave Charli meds and she stayed with me until Nicole came home. I napped, visited with Nicole waiting to hear from Jenn about Ben. His fever was down so I moved back to Jenn's. Saturday went out to lunch with Jenn and family. Then back to her house for a nap. Nicole's came for dinner that night so was fun to watch kids play together. Nate is sick now. PRAY that I don't get whatever they all had.

When I got home I realized my furnace is not working so have repairman here now. I was able to get fireplace going this morning so it has taken the chill off the house.


I am low on energy so pray for increased ambition and then peace to rest as needed. I feel as if I need to push myself just a little but hard to balance.

October 15

Yesterday was rough. I was SICK. I called cancer center and was asked to come in for an IV. Barb and Paula came to the house and helped me get to town. Pastor Julia met us there. I did lab work. It came back with a low white count and low potassium levels. I am to increase that med. I received a liter of fluids, meds for nausea and anxiety. I had to use the wheelchair to get into the building but was able to walk out on my own power. I was actually hungry for supper and did eat. I did not sleep well so am a little tired today. I also spoke with the social worker and she was pleased with the work I am doing with my counselor.

Barb and Harry have invited me to go to Kansas City this afternoon for the weekend. I NEED to be with people and to see my grand children. Pray this morning for me to have clarity of thought about what will be best for me.

October 13

A new day, a chance for a new beginning, may I use it in obedience to God my Savior. I spent the morning in quiet prayer and journaling. When things get rough I tend to run from journaling. I should know by now that setting my thoughts to words can be helpful, even if my thoughts are not positive. Something about getting it out in writing helps me. My counselor gave me an assignment to release my anger, to own the cancer (surrender) and to find reason to give thanks to God. Because I am a control freak admitting I am not in control of this dreadful disease is almost impossible for me to do. I had so many plans for my future and now am afraid to hope. Pray for me. For each of you who continue to offer prayers for me I give thanks. May God bless you bountifully.

1 Down 5 to go

Sorry I did not write yesterday, but am having a hard time with depression. If I just pull the covers up tight and lock out the world maybe this will go away..... I had a hard time getting out of bed this morning, of course it does not help that it is raining and a good day to snuggle in.

Yesterday went well as I was enveloped with love from the MCA staff. They were shocked and saddened to see me back in 8 weeks. The treatment went well and I was home shortly after 2. I have the nausea pump on and am doing fine with that. Rested in the afternoon with a short nap. Last night was my first sleepless night. Finally went to sleep around 3. In the past when that happened I would pray for others but now can't keep my mind centered on even a single thought. This is so frustrating.

At 2 today MaryAnne is taking me to my therapist. I need help getting my thought patterns in order and not waste a single moment of this gift of life. Praying Lexapro kicks in soon.

CHEMO

I visited with Dr. Honeycutt this afternoon and the biopsy indicated the same form of sarcoma in lymph nodes around my spine. I will begin chemo Wednesday at 8:15 until 1;30. It is only one day a week and then I have three weeks off. The drug they will be trying this time is Taxol. I will still wear an anti-nausea pump for three days to see if we can get my vomiting under control. I am exhausted, weepy and angry that this has happened so quickly. PRAY for this drup to work and it might buy me a couple years.

CHEMO

CT Biopsy

Pastor Julia called early morning to pray with me. Barb came around 9 and prayed. I was frightened and not sure if I wanted to do the test, but knew in my heart I need answers.

I had an IV placed in my right hand instead of the port since I laid on my stomach for 45 minutes. They did scans and then gave me Verstaid for pain. I was awake for the procedure but felt no pain. It took about 25 minutes. I was then taken to recovery for two hours. Barb and Pastor Julia were with me and that helped the time pass. I have no pain. I was home by 2, ate lunch (delicious pea soup), took a nap. Tony is here with me.

Thank you for all your prayers and thoughts today and yesterday on my birthday.